Thursday, March 15, 2012

the feeling...

Don't you just love days when you wake up and your bb light is blinking...and you wonder into thoughts of what the text could be, something along the lines of, "good morning sunshine...did you sleep well?"

So you unlock your phone and it's 3 personal emails, 2 forwards from your mum, 4 mentions on twitter, 1 text message from your Pastor and 2 bbm messages...

niiiice, 2 bbm messages?

You obviously save the bbm messages and check them last...you work your way slowly through the almost irrelevant messages, just because in your mind, there is a light at the end of the tunnel and the excitement is aggravated when it takes longer to get to them.

Now you're done the mails, forwards, tweets, text and now you attempt to open up your bbm...getting all giddy inside...even though your eyes aren't completely wide open and you're still sort of in sleep mode, all your body senses start to awaken in anticipation and hope..

You open up your bbm and two people have sent you messages.
One of the messages is the morning bible verse you get daily from a friend and the other is from another friend who just wanted to say wassup...

*sigh*

You begin to wish you had opened the bbm first and replied that one tweet last. There was no "hello sunshine..." nothin remotely close to icing your cake...just a bunch of messages killing your battery...

Funny how that one (special message, from that "special" someone) text that didn't come in, suddenly made all other messages seem like they were running your battery down...lol

Good Morning

*time to get ready for work*

....

*Typing from work now*

Thanks for all your advice on my previous post but truth be told, I don't think I'm up to having a conversation even though I'm 100% sure that's the solution. I'm bent on pretending I feel nothing and focussing on reading my novels to get him off my mind completely.

He lives in the next building, works with the same organization, goes to the same church...etc, I can't handle the awkwardness after. If things weren't so "coincidental" in that we weren't at the same places, involved in the same things, I might, MIGHT, go ahead and attack the issue head on. Generally, I have enuff courage to do what I think is necessary, but this guy has got me all weak and constantly second-guessing confrontation.

In my mind, the least painful solution would be if someone who knew told him and I didn't know about it...

What if we have a conversation and it's all sour and stuff?
I'm too emotional now to handle sour.

Silly emotions got me feeling less of a woman...weak n stuff, yuck! I don't like weak.

H

6 CrushTHOTs:

BBB said...

i wish you would gather the courage to tell him how you feel
above all just make sure you do what will make and keep you happy.
oh and i can relate to that bbm story lol

BSNC said...

Like BBB said just gather the courage to talk to him. No battery will die in this case you are not weak, but strong lol.

Okeoghene said...

I agree with BSNC, and you would not only be strong from it, you will also have closure. lmho @ the bbm story

Myne Whitman said...

can you send him an anonymous email? LOL...

doll said...

i better go and read the previous post to refresh my memory...

But the red light blinking stuff....i can relate

H said...

@BBB, I've decided to just scratch him jo...lol...Doll addressed sumn in my previous post (she capitalized on the fact that I donna if he likes me...he probably doesn't so y am I even thinking bout him? its the stupid mixed feelings)

@BSNC... LOL

@OK, u're all probably right but he's said a few things that keep steering me away from confrontation, like he's hinting that he knows n is pulling away cuz of that? I donno...

@Myne....hahahaha, thx for the comic relief

@doll, alas, I am not alone...lol

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